Monday, March 18, 2013

In which Tryph doesn't say what she wants to

Or what I need to most times.

But neither does the rest of the world to be honest.  The internet is great sometimes, but others it's just a giant pain in the ass full of misconceptions, preconceived notions and a whole lot of conclusions jumped to.

Have a picture of a kitten, 
because who doesn't like kittens?
For instance, a year ago I lost a friend over conclusions she had jumped to.  I was dealing with a huge real life situation involving my son and missed her birthday.  It completely slipped my mind, but when dealing with your child informing you that he has told his school councillor that you beat him... well I'm sure most would agree, I could be forgiven for missing it.

But instead of forgiveness, what happened was she paired that perceived slight with the fact that I had culled a lot of incredibly negative people from my twitter following recently.  OBVIOUSLY, I meant her, and OBVIOUSLY I intended to hurt her.

I didn't, and we are no longer friends.  I'm not innocent in any of this either.  I didn't speak up and tell her what had actually happened on my side... Granted I was hurt and angry by the things she said about me to her friends.  Honestly I'm still hurt now, but it's not an excuse.  I am continuing to perpetuate the madness by not speaking up.

I'm not alone in this either.  So many people out there are absolutely SURE that someone is talking about them when 99% of the time they aren't. Worse still is it involves thinly veiled comments, or even direct statements without a target.

I am guilty of this.  Just as guilty as the next person.  I'll make comments about scumbag boys without saying who when I have 2 clear targets in mind.  I'll comment about jerks who play pretend or try to show off how they're the cleverest person in the room with their innane commentary when any one of several people set me off.  I'll talk about how negative people who dwell on the awful annoy me, without saying who.  And I'll whine about someone's pomp and circumstance regarding situations that would better be handled in a quieter and mature fashion, but do you know who I'm talking about.

Guess the point I'm trying to make here is that we should stop talking AT people, or even ABOUT people.  Maybe the world would be a better place if we started talking TO people instead.

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