Wednesday, December 8, 2010

in which tryph finally gets around to this

I'm sorry guys... I kind of suck at the blogging lately. Happiness begats a normal sleeping schedule and less to rant about.

That said, there are things that I've got to post, and I've gotten "approval" to do so. This is something that involves someone else, so I kind of needed to vet my decision to blog about it with them.

Anyhow... I'll spare you the details... Most who want to know already know, but those who don't and want to, feel free to contact me directly.

Ten and a half years ago I was ago I had just turned 19 and was in love. I was also a very messed up young woman who didn't love or respect herself.

Anyhow, I met a man, got pregnant, got married and proceeded to spend the next decade hurting and angry. This is where I'll spare the deets... I'll just say we were both desperately unhappy.

We stayed in this cycle of anger, resentment and control for a lot of years. We both did some pretty awful things to one another in the last decade, and while I don't agree with any of it; I know now where it came from.

Anyhow... The long and the short of it is that after 10 years of fighting, I decided to end my marriage.

This all happened last May.

Now on paper I'm still married. I also still cohabitate the same house with... well I suppose for the time being I can still call him the manthing. And we haven't told our families. We're holding off on that until, well until we make things official. In short, our families are prone to advice and while they think they're wanting the best for us, all they really have is their own preconceived notions and have a habit of not thinking about what we want or need.

The manthing and I have both come to the understanding that things are through. That our relationship was unhealthy at best, and starting over from scratch is the only rational solution. We skipped over being friends ten and a half years ago, and we're not going to skip it now. We have a child together and it's important that we can be on the same page.

And it's funny, for the first time in a decade, we actually LIKE each other. We're enjoying talking to each other. I think this is the start of a beautiful friendship.

So yeah, Tryph's marriage has unofficially been over since last May.

1 comment:

Sari said...

I am so happy you're happy. *hugs*