Thursday, April 15, 2010

In which Shana tells the truth, like a liar

To say that I had an unusual relationship with my mother would be putting it lightly.

This said, she gave me a number of life lessons that I carry with me even to this day.

The one I want to talk about today is about how she taught me to always be honest, but not necessarily let whomever you're telling the truth to, KNOW that you're being entirely honest.

You see, the woman is (and it seems at times I am as well) is so great at telling a truth so outlandishly, that no one believes her.

She even gave me an example, an excerpt of a conversation she had with my father, aka the sperm donor. Basically it went like this...

But first... backstory!

My mother got pregnant young (14) , married young (20 or 21 I think) and was with completely the WRONG man. He was crazy violent (which I believe I've covered off before) and she was young, stupid and scared. So times while he was in jail (which was often. he was actually arrested for attempted murder on their wedding day. No lies... but I suppose his heart was sort of in the right place. I'm not sure of all of the details, but the young man he tried to kill did something to my aunt that wasn't appreciated, or so the story goes)

Anyhow, my mom cheated on my father. She's told me this.

But the point of this story is the fact that my mother was 100% honest with my wife beating, drug addicted father about the fact that she was having sex with another man.

He'd come home from work and ask her "so what did you do today?"

Without batting an eye she'd say "well, after you left for work my boyfriend came over and we fucked all afternoon"

And never believed her.

I think this is an awful talent to have, and even more awful that she taught me. I wonder how many times I've exploited this skill.

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