Wednesday, March 3, 2010

In which Shana is kind of stupid, and... No stupid covers it

I read into things.

This is mostly because I am paranoid, and think that everyone hates me.

I can honestly count on 1 hand how many people have hated me in my life. At least the ones who made their presence known to me. I talked about rational and irrational brain the other day. Rational brain(RB from now on) recognizes that most people don't really think about me all that often. Not that they hate me or don't care about me, but don't factor me and my feelings into the equation of their daily lives.

Irrational brain (herein refered to as IRB) thinks that everyone hates me, or dislikes me enough to think about how things are going to hurt me.

RB spends a lot of time either laughing at, or shaking her head at IRB.

Anyhow. I find something out (as both ubiquitous and evasive as I plan to be), and RB goes, hrm... this isn't how I'd like it to be, maybe I should try changing things. IRB on the other hand freaks out and says, this isn't how I'd like it to be, it must be because it wasn't meant to be (or how anyone else wants it to be, or they hate me etc).

this leaves me divided on where to go.

Normally I just ignore both of them and do nothing.

So yeah... was there a point to this post?

Not that I can see.

ugh, writing with a headache sucks because it not only makes no sense, but ends up resulting in nothing at all.

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